The Grace Fueled Wife | Christian Marriage, Emotional Intimacy, Communication & Conflict Resolution
Are you sitting in a marriage that feels empty? Struggling to connect with your husband or wondering why communication in your marriage feels so hard? Maybe you feel lonely in your marriage even though you’re still living under the same roof.
Maybe you’re telling yourself you’re just sticking it out for the kids… and what really keeps you in the marriage is your commitment to God.
If this is you, I’ve been there. And I want to help you reconnect in your marriage, rebuild emotional intimacy, and feel cherished again.
Hey, I’m Beatriz Vargas — a Christian marriage coach, Jesus-loving wife, and mom. I’ve been married for over 15 years, but for the first five years of our marriage we struggled with constant conflict, poor communication, and emotional disconnection.
I was busy telling my husband all the things he was doing wrong — what he needed to change, how he needed Jesus, and what he needed to do to make me happy.
We tried marriage counseling, small groups, and all the things we were told would fix our marriage. Nothing worked… and eventually we separated.
But learning how communication, emotional safety, and grace actually work inside a marriage changed everything.
Today, my husband and I have the affectionate, emotionally connected marriage I once thought was impossible.
On The Grace Fueled Wife Podcast, you’ll learn how to:
• communicate more effectively with your husband
• break unhealthy conflict cycles in marriage
• rebuild emotional intimacy and connection
• stop feeling lonely in your marriage
• navigate difficult conversations with grace
• strengthen your Christian marriage even when your husband isn’t changing
If you feel like you’re the only one trying to save your marriage… if you’re tired of having the same arguments over and over… or if you’re longing to feel close again, this podcast will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the surface.
Each week we talk about communication in marriage, conflict resolution, emotional intimacy, and how faith and grace can help restore connection in even the most difficult seasons of marriage.
So grab your journal, take a deep breath, and let’s start creating the connected, grace-fueled marriage you’ve been praying for.
Listen on:
Episodes
Friday Mar 08, 2024
Friday Mar 08, 2024
In this week’s podcast, we dive deep into the ins and outs of building a sturdy foundation in marriage. I take you through a group coaching exercise, encouraging you to rate your marriages and personal mental health. We discuss the critical role appreciation, taking responsibility, open communication, and self-care play in fostering a healthy, vibrant marriage.
We delve into the 'Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse' concept coined by the Gottman Institute, pinpointing the dangerous behaviors that could mark a marriage heading towards divorce. I also present how to recognize and replace these negative behaviors with healthier alternatives.
00:00 Introduction and Podcast Welcome
00:04 Building a Solid Foundation in Marriage
00:41 The Importance of Self-Assessment in Marriage
00:56 Understanding the Marriage Rating Scale
02:50 The Importance of Self-Care in Marriage
03:57 Marriage Coaching and Self-Study Options
05:53 Envisioning a Level 10 Marriage
06:54 Four Tactical Steps to Improve Your Marriage
08:41 Understanding the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in Marriage
09:34 Practical Steps to Avoid the Four Horsemen
13:01 The Importance of Timeouts in Conflict Resolution
16:15 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
The Thrive Marriage Lab by Restory Counseling closes doors for registration on April 7th and will not open again until next year. Enter GFW in the coupon code for $20 off your monthly membership. This is a GREAT way to start building that healthy foundation for your marriage.
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Wednesday Feb 28, 2024
Wednesday Feb 28, 2024
On this episode of the Grace Fueled Wife, we get to dive into conversations all about marriage, healing, and the power of stories with the exceptional Tracy Johnson. Tracy's work at Restory Counseling inspired me on my own journey to becoming a marriage therapist. She gives us the scoop on what it means to engage our personal stories in marriage and how that can supercharge healing. Tracy shares a deeply moving personal story about the weight of past experiences and the healing power of having someone witness your pain. We then delve into Restory's Year of Good Dates, an awesome tool Tracy's team developed that's all about sparking connection through shared storytelling. Tracy also drops details about what you can expect from the Thrive Marriage Lab, which is like a gym membership for your marriage! This program brings resources, growth opportunities, and a real community spirit straight into your relationship. If you're all about creating a deeper, richer connection in your marriage, this episode is filled with tons of valuable takeaways. Check it out!
00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction
00:24 Exploring Your Marriage Story
01:17 Guest Introduction: Tracy Johnson
03:43 Understanding the Role of Family of Origin in Marriage
06:50 Advice for Reengaging a Disengaged Spouse
09:39 The Importance of Self-Awareness in Marriage
11:03 The Role of Loneliness in Marriage
13:34 The Concept of 'ACK': Awareness, Curiosity, Kindness
16:47 A Year of Good Dates: Engaging Each Other's Story
21:24 A Drive to Dairy Queen: A Personal Story
22:43 Understanding the Impact of Past Experiences
23:36 The Power of Witnessing and Understanding
24:29 The Role of Trauma in Relationships
26:58 Choosing to Remember: A Path to Healing
28:26 The Importance of Personal Work in Relationships
30:10 The Power of Story Work and Witnessing
37:22 The Thrive Marriage Lab: A Resource for Couples
40:51 Closing Thoughts and Appreciation
You can find Tracy’s info here:
ReStory Counseling:
Website: https://www.restory.life
Facebook: facebook.com/ReStory.Life
Instagram: @storyrestored
Thrive Marriage Lab:
Website: https://www.restory.life/thrive CODE: GFW for 20% off!
FREE 12 Months of Dates: How date nights can lead to connectionSubscribe here: www.restory.life/thrive-dates
How healthy is your marriage? Take our FREE marriage assessment here: https://www.restory.life/marriage-assessment
Instagram: @ThriveMarriageLab
Youtube: @ThriveMarriageLab
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Tuesday Feb 06, 2024
Tuesday Feb 06, 2024
Communication struggles are one of the most common issues in marriage. You are not alone if this applies to you. In this week’s episode, we discuss the importance of communication, and I share three key ideas for improving your communication in marriage.
First, we recognize that everything a person does or doesn't do communicates something. Second, we look to understand the lens or perspective through which communications are filtered, both when speaking and listening. Lastly, I emphasize the importance of allowing spiritual guidance in communication, particularly in difficult conversations.
We also talk about this month’s Podcast birthday celebration where we are giving away Amazon gift cards to listeners who join the mailing list and submit a review of the podcast.
00:52 The Importance of Communication
01:36 Podcast Birthday Celebration and Giveaway
04:07 Understanding Communication in Relationships
08:02 The Power of Perception in Communication
19:03 The Role of God in Communication
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Wednesday Jan 31, 2024
Wednesday Jan 31, 2024
In this week’s episode, I continue my conversation with Annette Otlmans. Annette takes us into the mind of a chronic abuser and gives us the 4 pillars of emotional abuse which are:
Ridgid thinking in these areas:
Entitlement
Image management
Faulty belief system
Lower emotional IQ
Annette and I also discuss what the bible says about submission, oppression, and abuse as it relates to being a biblical wife. We talk about toxic masculinity but also acknowledge the ways in which the patriarchy can be benevolent.
Lastly, Annette gives us resources and steps to take if we realize we’re in an abusive relationship but aren’t able to or choose not to leave.
If this episode resonated with you or you think may apply to someone you know, please share it!
If you want to learn more about the Mend Project, please visit https://themendproject.com/ or follow them on IG: https://www.instagram.com/themendproject/?hl=en
Here are the other resources she mentioned:
Website: Natalie Hoffman https://www.flyingfreenow.com/
Book: The Emotionally Destructive Marriage by: Leslie Burnick
Book: Dating loving and leaving a narcissist by: Dr. Jamie Zuckerman
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Monday Jan 29, 2024
Monday Jan 29, 2024
Do you ever feel like what is wrong with me? Am I not loveable? Why do we have so many communication problems? Are you wondering why your relationship is so toxic? Have you felt like you’re walking on eggshells and can’t determine if your husband is abusive or just has a cranky demeanor?
All these questions are answered in this interview with Annette Oltmans of the Mend Project as she shares her work with us on covert emotional abuse. This is one of my most important episodes to date because as Annette says - “Clarity is the first step to healing.”
She answers questions such as:
What is emotional abuse?
What is double abuse and what can pastors and therapists do to prevent it?
How can we discern if we are in a double abuse situation?
What is the responsibility of the complementarian church as it relates to abuse and telling women to submit to their husbands?
What are common abusive behaviors and red flags we should look out for?
What is the difference between someone with a mean/cranky disposition (or someone raised with bad habits) vs. a chronic abuser?
If this episode resonated with you or you think may apply to someone you know, please share it! If you want to learn more about the Mend Project, please visit https://themendproject.com/
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Monday Jan 15, 2024
Monday Jan 15, 2024
A loving and connected marriage doesn’t happen by accident. It takes work and intention. In fact, all intimacy takes intention! Whether that be with your husband or the Lord, in today's episode, Rosie Alejandro gives us tips to grow your relationship with God and strengthen your marriage.
If you loved today's guest, you can find out more about her here:
Website: https://theintentionalchristianwoman.com/
Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-intentional-christian-woman-daily-bible-study/id1568177949
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Monday Jan 08, 2024
Monday Jan 08, 2024
Here are 5 of my newest book recommendations to help you achieve a more loving and connected marriage! Listen in to find out why I think these books are special and how I think they can help you in your marriage journey today.
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Thursday Jan 04, 2024
Thursday Jan 04, 2024
Most women looking to save their marriages first look to try marriage counseling. While Marriage counseling can be really helpful, there are important things to know before you invest time and money into the process.
Not to mention that I take issue with some things that happen in marriage counseling and think it’s important to know the types of marriage counseling I recommend. This episode will let you know what red flags to look for when searching for a marriage counselor, what types of marriage therapists I encourage you to consider, and what work you can do BEFORE you get to marriage counseling that will help you achieve better results!
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Wednesday Dec 27, 2023
Wednesday Dec 27, 2023
We’ve all been there, we’ve all prayed for a thing that was in God’s will or truly believed it to be in His will and wondered why that prayer wasn’t answered or wasn’t answered the way we thought it should.
This conversation between friends will fill your cup and encourage you in a profound way in that season. In this episode, my friend shares the story of how she prayed in earnest to save her marriage but still ended up in divorce. She shares how God has brought her through it. What he did, and is still doing. You will be left with hope and peace.
Save this episode and share it. You won’t be disappointed.
Wait!!! Before you go!
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider
Wednesday Dec 20, 2023
Wednesday Dec 20, 2023
Infidelity…Let’s talk about it. For a show on marriages, I’m surprised I don’t talk about it more! In this week’s episode, we talk about the root cause of infidelity, discern the risk factors that might exist for our own marriages, and explore ways to guard our marriage against it.
Even if - or especially if, you haven’t walked through infidelity before, this episode is for you!!!
Wait!!! Before you go!
Work with me:
Schedule a 45 min 1:1 coaching call: https://thegracefueledwife.com/coaching
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free.
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news: https://thegracefueledwife.com/insider