The Grace Fueled Wife | Communication, Intimacy, Restoration, Marriage

E187// How to be less Critical and communicate gracefully w. Deborah Smith Pegues

In this episode of the Gracefield Wife Podcast, I have the distinct honor of hosting Debra Smith Pegues. Debra is a best-selling author, global inspirational speaker, CPA, MBA, certified John Maxwell leadership coach, and Bible teacher who shares 45 years of marital wisdom. We discuss her journey, the secrets to her successful marriage, and the importance of communication and confrontation in maintaining a healthy relationship. Debra provides invaluable insights on how to approach difficult conversations lovingly and respectfully, the significance of prayer alongside confrontation, and the balance between submission and self-respect in marriage. We also touch on practical tips from her book, '30 Days to Taming Your Tongue,' and her guide, '10 Commandments for a Heavenly Marriage.' This episode is packed with wisdom for any woman navigating the complexities of marital relationships.
04:43 Secrets to a Successful Marriage
06:16 Navigating Spiritual Differences in Marriage
08:40 The Power of Words in Marriage
13:22 Effective Communication Strategies
20:34 The Importance of Confrontation
21:14 Effective Communication Techniques
23:02 Setting Boundaries and Consequences
25:22 Balancing Submission and Confrontation
33:06 The Role of Prayer in Conflict Resolution
36:55 Final Thoughts and Resources
 
Did you love our guest? Here is where to learn more:
Website: https://confrontingissues.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deborahsmithpegues/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DeborahSmithPegues/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DeborahSmithPegues
 
Wait!!! Before you go! These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com

E186// The 3 C's to standing for your marriage in the midst of trouble or separation

Hello, and welcome back to the Grace Field's Wife podcast! After a brief hiatus due to my training as a marriage and family therapist, I'm excited to bring fresh insights to our podcast. This week, we tackle the pressing question: 'How do you stand for your marriage in the midst of trouble or separation?' I'll share three essential Cs: Clarity, Commitment, and Community. We'll discuss identifying whether your relationship is abusive or just disappointing, understanding your and your husband's commitment levels, and the importance of having a supportive community. These steps will equip you with the practical tools to navigate through marital struggles effectively. Join our Facebook group or become an insider to stay connected and find more resources. Until next week!
 
00:00 Welcome Back to the Grace Field's Wife Podcast
03:53 The Importance of Clarity in Marriage
12:16 Understanding Commitment in Marriage
14:40 The Power of Community Support
20:54 Conclusion and Next Steps
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some other ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity

E185// What's more important in your marriage than strong communication?

In this episode, we discuss the value that is even more important to your marriage than communication and why. We also talk about the limitations of working on your marriage alone and what skills can be learned even if only one spouse is participating.
 
For those of you looking to enrich your marriage and become the hero in your marriage story, check out The Marriage Lab and enter GFW in the coupon code to secure $20 off your monthly marriage membership.
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some other ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
My group coaching program - The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity

E184// What do healthy boundaries in my marriage look like?

In this episode, I discuss the importance of establishing healthy boundaries in marriage by reviewing 5 rules for healthy boundaries. Through the examples presented, I illustrate how these principles can help couples navigate the complexities of marriage, empower themselves, and foster mutual respect and love.
 
00:08 The Importance of Healthy Boundaries in Marriage
04:48 Exploring the Laws of Boundaries in Marriage
06:09 Applying Boundary Laws to Real-Life Scenarios
14:52 The Power of Choice and Respect in Marriage
 
You've heard me talk about it, now check out The Marriage Lab  and enter GFW in the coupon code to secure $20 off your monthly marriage membership!!
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some other ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
My group coaching program - The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity

E183// Build a strong foundation in your marriage in 4 (easy?) steps!

In this week’s podcast, we dive deep into the ins and outs of building a sturdy foundation in marriage. I take you through a group coaching exercise, encouraging you to rate your marriages and personal mental health. We discuss the critical role appreciation, taking responsibility, open communication, and self-care play in fostering a healthy, vibrant marriage. 
 
We delve into the 'Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse' concept coined by the Gottman Institute, pinpointing the dangerous behaviors that could mark a marriage heading towards divorce. I also present how to recognize and replace these negative behaviors with healthier alternatives.
 
00:00 Introduction and Podcast Welcome
00:04 Building a Solid Foundation in Marriage
00:41 The Importance of Self-Assessment in Marriage
00:56 Understanding the Marriage Rating Scale
02:50 The Importance of Self-Care in Marriage
03:57 Marriage Coaching and Self-Study Options
05:53 Envisioning a Level 10 Marriage
06:54 Four Tactical Steps to Improve Your Marriage
08:41 Understanding the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in Marriage
09:34 Practical Steps to Avoid the Four Horsemen
13:01 The Importance of Timeouts in Conflict Resolution
16:15 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
 
The Thrive Marriage Lab by Restory Counseling closes doors for registration on April 7th and will not open again until next year. Enter GFW in the coupon code for $20 off your monthly membership. This is a GREAT way to start building that healthy foundation for your marriage.  
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
My group coaching program - The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
 

E182// Improve emotional intimacy through your marriage story & have a year of good dates w. Tracy Johnson

On this episode of the Grace Fueled Wife, we get to dive into conversations all about marriage, healing, and the power of stories with the exceptional Tracy Johnson. Tracy's work at Restory Counseling inspired me on my own journey to becoming a marriage therapist. She gives us the scoop on what it means to engage our personal stories in marriage and how that can supercharge healing. Tracy shares a deeply moving personal story about the weight of past experiences and the healing power of having someone witness your pain. We then delve into Restory's Year of Good Dates, an awesome tool Tracy's team developed that's all about sparking connection through shared storytelling. Tracy also drops details about what you can expect from the Thrive Marriage Lab, which is like a gym membership for your marriage! This program brings resources, growth opportunities, and a real community spirit straight into your relationship. If you're all about creating a deeper, richer connection in your marriage, this episode is filled with tons of valuable takeaways. Check it out!
 
00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction
00:24 Exploring Your Marriage Story
01:17 Guest Introduction: Tracy Johnson
03:43 Understanding the Role of Family of Origin in Marriage
06:50 Advice for Reengaging a Disengaged Spouse
09:39 The Importance of Self-Awareness in Marriage
11:03 The Role of Loneliness in Marriage
13:34 The Concept of 'ACK': Awareness, Curiosity, Kindness
16:47 A Year of Good Dates: Engaging Each Other's Story
21:24 A Drive to Dairy Queen: A Personal Story
22:43 Understanding the Impact of Past Experiences
23:36 The Power of Witnessing and Understanding
24:29 The Role of Trauma in Relationships
26:58 Choosing to Remember: A Path to Healing
28:26 The Importance of Personal Work in Relationships
30:10 The Power of Story Work and Witnessing
37:22 The Thrive Marriage Lab: A Resource for Couples
40:51 Closing Thoughts and Appreciation
 
You can find Tracy’s info here:
ReStory Counseling:
Website: https://www.restory.life
Facebook: facebook.com/ReStory.Life
Instagram:  @storyrestored
Thrive Marriage Lab:
Website: https://www.restory.life/thrive CODE: GFW for 20% off!  
FREE 12 Months of Dates: How date nights can lead to connectionSubscribe here: www.restory.life/thrive-dates
How healthy is your marriage? Take our FREE marriage assessment here: https://www.restory.life/marriage-assessment
Instagram: @ThriveMarriageLab
Youtube: @ThriveMarriageLab
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity

E181// Are you having trouble with communication in your marriage? These 3 questions can help!

Communication struggles are one of the most common issues in marriage. You are not alone if this applies to you. In this week’s episode, we discuss the importance of communication, and I share three key ideas for improving your communication in marriage. 
First, we recognize that everything a person does or doesn't do communicates something. Second, we look to understand the lens or perspective through which communications are filtered, both when speaking and listening. Lastly, I emphasize the importance of allowing spiritual guidance in communication, particularly in difficult conversations. 
We also talk about this month’s Podcast birthday celebration where we are giving away Amazon gift cards to listeners who join the mailing list and submit a review of the podcast.
 
00:52 The Importance of Communication
01:36 Podcast Birthday Celebration and Giveaway
04:07 Understanding Communication in Relationships
08:02 The Power of Perception in Communication
19:03 The Role of God in Communication
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
My group coaching program - The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com

E180// What goes on in the mind of a covert narcissist? What does the bible say about submission, oppression and abuse? w. Annette Oltmanns (Part 2)

In this week’s episode, I continue my conversation with Annette Otlmans. Annette takes us into the mind of a chronic abuser and gives us the 4 pillars of emotional abuse which are:
Ridgid thinking in these areas:
Entitlement
Image management
Faulty belief system
Lower emotional IQ  
Annette and I also discuss what the bible says about submission, oppression, and abuse as it relates to being a biblical wife. We talk about toxic masculinity but also acknowledge the ways in which the patriarchy can be benevolent. 
Lastly, Annette gives us resources and steps to take if we realize we’re in an abusive relationship but aren’t able to or choose not to leave. 
If this episode resonated with you or you think may apply to someone you know, please share it!
If you want to learn more about the Mend Project, please visit https://themendproject.com/ or follow them on IG: https://www.instagram.com/themendproject/?hl=en
Here are the other resources she mentioned:
Website: Natalie Hoffman https://www.flyingfreenow.com/
Book: The Emotionally Destructive Marriage by: Leslie Burnick
Book: Dating loving and leaving a narcissist by: Dr. Jamie Zuckerman
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com

E179// Is your husband mean or cranky and you’re looking for clarity to discern emotional abuse? w. Annette Oltmanns (Part 1)

Do you ever feel like what is wrong with me? Am I not loveable? Why do we have so many communication problems? Are you wondering why your relationship is so toxic? Have you felt like you’re walking on eggshells and can’t determine if your husband is abusive or just has a cranky demeanor?
All these questions are answered in this interview with Annette Oltmans of the Mend Project as she shares her work with us on covert emotional abuse. This is one of my most important episodes to date because as Annette says - “Clarity is the first step to healing.”
She answers questions such as:
What is emotional abuse? 
What is double abuse and what can pastors and therapists do to prevent it?
How can we discern if we are in a double abuse situation? 
What is the responsibility of the complementarian church as it relates to abuse and telling women to submit to their husbands? 
What are common abusive behaviors and red flags we should look out for? 
What is the difference between someone with a mean/cranky disposition (or someone raised with bad habits) vs. a chronic abuser? 
If this episode resonated with you or you think may apply to someone you know, please share it! If you want to learn more about the Mend Project, please visit https://themendproject.com/
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com

E178// Do you want to have an intentional Christian Marriage? Learn how with Rosie Alejandro

A loving and connected marriage doesn’t happen by accident. It takes work and intention. In fact, all intimacy takes intention!  Whether that be with your husband or the Lord, in today's episode, Rosie Alejandro gives us tips to grow your relationship with God and strengthen your marriage. 
 
If you loved today's guest, you can find out more about her here:
Website: https://theintentionalchristianwoman.com/
Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-intentional-christian-woman-daily-bible-study/id1568177949
 
Wait!!! Before you go! 
Here are some ways you can work with me or become a part of my community!
 
Work with me:
Schedule a FREE discovery call: https://gracefueledwifecall.gr8.com/
The Grace Fueled Marriage Method: https://gracefueledmarriagemethod.com
Not ready to work with me yet? These are some ways to learn about me for free. 
Join my community on Facebook - The Grace Fueled Wives Club https://www.facebook.com/groups/GraceFueledWifeCommunity
Become an Insider and get updates on all the podcast news.  Gracefueledwifesteps.gr8.com